Last Friday, I had an epiphany. In my 2015 blog, I wrote about the 4 ingredients that constitute a relationship. My 2016 blog added another 3. My 2021 blog was a summary. These 7 ingredients define many (or all) types of relationships: communication, forgiveness, intimacy, respect, togetherness, trust and vulnerability. Any type of relationship starts - and ends -...
Intimacy

Balancing friendship, intimacy and trust
22 Mar, 2021
Recently, my best friend forever acknowledged that I'm still her BFF despite all that happened since we broke up. I'm relieved that we've finally reconnected. She asked me if there could still be a future between us. I had to consider her question. I said that it's definitely not a no. It's probably a yes, provided that certain conditions would be met. She said...

What constitutes a relationship?
1 Feb, 2021
Recently, a father sent congratulations on his daughter's wedding on Dutch radio. That message also mentioned that this couple is each other's friend. Latter struck a nerve. Despite some exceptions, a lack of friendship is indeed characteristic for my failed relationships. Moreover, the people whom you will miss, are your...
Lust for Life
7 Oct, 2020
Late September, I noticed a personal ad in a newspaper. One Dutch word hit me in the face: "levenslust" or "lust for life". My many disappointments in Love had disrupted my lust for life. In the absence of Hope and Love, Doubt and Fear will take over (my blogs). In my life, doubt has a central spot because doubt forces me to keep an open mind. This kind of...

Trialism, dualism and monism in Love
8 Jul, 2020
A recent Dutch article caught my attention. Its subtitle claims the following: (i) a monogamous relationship hurts having another love, and (ii) the alternatives do, however, not offer the growth that one (1) partner can offer. I was intrigued by the dualism in this article. Nevertheless, I felt something was missing in this article and went looking for it....
Shattered illusions
8 Apr, 2020
I suppose that many people fear that the coronavirus pandemic marks the end of a period and the start of a new one. For many, the years up to and including 2019 have shown abundance. The year 2020 shows shortages in areas that are new to us. It's hard to believe that "old times" can and will return. The year 2020 is shattering our illusions. Our illusions may have...
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