Tuesday last week, several people commented on my draft blog on Parenting. One of them included a nasty judgement about me without even knowing me. We live 2,000+ kilometers away. She claims she is my friend and even her brother. To me, her comment felt as betrayal of our (online) friendship.
Her comment didn’t hurt me though because you can only hurt someone with the truth.
Falsehoods and/or lies may sting but shouldn’t hurt you (emotionally).
“True remorse is never just a regret over consequences; it is a regret over motive.” Mignon McLaughlin
About two months ago, I made the mistake of revealing info to a close friend that was supposed to stay secret. I also made a nasty judgement on her boyfriend. She said my judgement is shared by others but that she loves him. She concluded that my timing couldn’t have been worse. We hardly spoke since.
- Can I trust this person?
- Can I respect this person?
I suppose our initial contact answers the first question. Subsequent contact is about the second question. Perhaps, virtual contact (eg, email, WhatsApp) cannot answer these questions on trust and respect. Perhaps, only physical contact can. I may continue this line of thought in a subsequent blog.
It took me a while making a diagram of the above.
The explanations that come to mind are complex; not simple. I doubt my diagram is complete.
Don’t criticize my friends
Criticize my ideas
Don’t criticize my lifestyle
Note: all markings (bold, italic, underlining) by LO unless in quotes or stated otherwise.