Last Monday, I watched a French film on Netflix (eg, IMDb). After 1 hour and 9 minutes, someone says: “This woman needs me. Her children need me. And I want to be needed.” Note: markings in quote by LO. I paused the movie and made a note. I wondered: is this what life is all about?
There is a difference between being needed, wanted or believed in. I have a friend, who thought she was needed. Unfortunately, she became convinced that all he wanted was her house. However, she doesn’t believe in cohabiting. She needs and wants her freedom. Hence, the relationship did not last long.
The above relates to my concept of Needs, Wants & Beliefs but it did not (fully) address the above. I think, feel and believe that I overlooked the need to be needed, the want to be wanted, the belief to be believed. My concept focused on outbound (eg, macro, objects) rather than inbound (eg, micro, subjects).
The remark “I want to be needed” struck a nerve inside me because it made me wonder if this is what I’m missing. Am I needed and by whom? I’m allergic for people who want me but for the wrong reasons (eg, car, house, money, network). I’m skeptic about people who believe in me while I doubt myself.
There are various degrees of being needed; some are good and some are bad. Nevertheless, being needed is kind of addictive. It’s like being the Sun in someone’s life (eg, for energy, light, warming). The 1972 song I Need You by the band America (see below) also shows the addictive part.
In the early 1980s, I received some 100+ letters from companies that wanted me (to apply for a job at their company). A few letters were based on a personal teacher recommendation. Being wanted is addictive.
I get uncomfortable when people believe in me. I do not tell the Truth. My aim is to open your eyes. I believe in Karl Popper‘s arguments, which claim that absolute truths may not exist in a given lifetime. Mathematics may qualify after so many centuries. At least, on planet Earth. Perhaps not in the Universe.
Last but not least, I noticed two intriguing quotes, following a search for the words “I want to be needed”.
I Need You (1972) by America
band, lyrics, video, Wiki-band, Wiki-song
I need you like the flower needs the rain
You know I need you, guess I’ll start it all again
You know I need you like the winter needs the spring
You know I need you, I need you
Note: all markings (bold, italic, underlining) by LO unless in quotes or stated otherwise.