Recently, a friend said that (s)he wished (s)he was dead. Several years ago, someone expressed a similar wish; see my 2015 blog The road to recovery from a burn-out and depression. At my weakest moments, I have a similar feeling. Then, I remember my promise to my friend who died in 2016, and “soldier on“.
The 2015 blog mentioned above, refers to my 2013 burnout and my subsequent 18 month depression. During that burnout, a voice inside my head urged me to “push my boundaries” (my recent blog).
During a more serious urge, I experienced a “divine intervention”. My eyes were repeatedly drawn to a 2005 film, called Constantine. I ignored that “impulse” twice. After the third time, I picked up the film and watched it. Its message was clear: that “voice” inside your head is not yours. It’s the dark side talking.
Ever since, I know “what” I’m up against. This makes it easier for me to soldier on.
Every dark cloud has a silver lining: I’ve no more fear of dying. Actually, my death may come as a relief to me: no more fighting in this mad, mad world (eg, lyrics, video, Wiki).
My daily inspiration makes me continue my writing. It’s also my cue that my time isn’t up yet. Recently, I made a Facebook comment that (premature) death has a micro (individual) and a macro (the big picture) perspective. We will never understand the first, and never know the latter. What remains to us, is acceptance.
The thing that few people seem to appreciate is that we are here on this planet to help others. Also see my 2015 blog Our individual purpose. However, helping others requires that we first help ourselves, similar to the airplane instruction with respect to oxygen masks. Please also listen to the song Help Yourself.
“Need someone to help me
An excerpt from the song Help Yourself from the 1976 album Joan Armatrading
But not you, you’re not ready
Seems you have trouble helping yourself”
Soldier On (2020) by DI-RECT
artists, lyrics, video, Wiki-1, Wiki-2
[Chorus]
Ain’t nobody out there as brave as you, you’re holdin’ your own
A million different voices that are trying to break you
Just listen to one
The one that’s inside you, and soldier on
Note: all markings (bold, italic, underlining) by LO unless in quotes or stated otherwise.
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