In 2004, the Swedish journalist and writer Stieg Larsson died at the age of 50. His estate included 3 unpublished novels. In 2005, his first novel was published: Men who hate women. One could summarize this book as follows: men who hate women for their power (not) to give what men want, and women who hate men for their power to take what men want.
About a week ago, an involuntary celibate (a.k.a. incel) guy (22) killed five people and then committed suicide. The Guardian: “[Name] expressed misogynistic and homophobic views and portrayed himself as a man in despair who raged against his mother and his failure to find a girlfriend.”
In 1943, Abraham Maslow defined his hierarchy of human needs: sex is in the first level of physiological needs, while intimacy is in the third level of needs for love & social belonging.
In my blogs, I have defined three collective human development stages (ie, Need, Wants & Beliefs) and one individual development stage (ie, Awakening). For Needs, see my paragraph on Abraham Maslow above. For Wants, see the Millennium trilogy by Stieg Larsson. For Beliefs, see the Guardian article on incel beliefs.
During dating, I’ve heard enough stories about men who do not give their wives what they want. Probably, their refusal is rooted in control and thus the power over women. Similarly, I know enough stories about women who do not give sex to their husbands for the sake of control and thus (the balance of) power in a relationship. Also see my blogs: The Ledger of a Relationship (2016) and A quid pro quo in relationships (2019).
This makes me wonder if Stieg Larsson‘s plot about misogyny might in fact be cultural and universal:
– men (subconsciously) hate women for their power (not) to give what men want, and
– women (subconsciously) hate men for their power to take what men want.
The above might seem farfetched. However, the adult film industry often uses the above in their storylines. Hence, cultural misogyny seems institutionalized albeit on a subconscious level.
A former girlfriend once said to me that she doesn’t believe in equality between men and women. I agreed, following her explanation. Men and women do need and complete each other but they’re not equal. Each have their own talents. Without equality, there’s no need for a power struggle. And yes, the opposite is also true.
This week, I argued to someone that the strive for equality in all veins of society, may well the cause for the rise in divorces, single households, and public cases of misogyny. I believe in this statistical correlation although evidence may not (yet) show this on paper.
“I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.” A quote by Winston S. Churchill (1874-1965).
Hate That I Love You (2007) by Rihanna featuring Ne-Yo
artist-1, artist-2, lyrics, video, Wiki-1, Wiki-2, Wiki-3
Note: all markings (bold, italic, underlining) by LO unless stated otherwise.
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