Recently, I finally met a lovely woman following long sweet talks. We had a nice afternoon and a cosy dinner. We laughed a lot. She was all I had assumed her to be. Several days later, she called me and broke up with me. She claimed her enthusiasm had only been based on my enthusiasm about her. She said she did not feel for me, in hindsight. Once again, I was flabbergasted.
I talked about this dating disaster with a friend, who is also my former girlfriend. She claimed that women are full of insecurities. She isn’t the first woman using that line for explaining certain erratic female behaviour.
Female insecurities aren’t only about Love. Many women complain about certain body parts. Many men don’t seem to care much about how they look. This discrepancy keeps intriguing me. I decided to update my 2018 diagram from my blog: The Fear of Love (2).
My updated 2019 diagram reflects a different spacetime dimension for men and women.
I think, feel and believe that men usually have a forward looking outlook, while women seem to have an immense historic database. Its accuracy is often a source for debate.
Many articles claim that the father figure is important to women, and the mother figure to men. Whether these father and mother figures had healthy relationships is much more relevant.
As a result, many women seem to be on the left side of my diagram and stuck in doubt and fear and unable to let the past be the past.
On the other side, many men appear to be on the right side of my diagram. Perhaps, this makes sense because men are less in touch with their feelings (ie, subconscious) than women. The pragmatism of men may explain their desire to look to the future as you cannot change the past.
The yellow circle in the middle explains why relationships still happen: Faith, Beliefs & Willpower, one of the other concepts in my blog articles.
“No girl shall love you unconditionally like your mother did and no man shall love you like your dad did. Unconditional love takes a lot of time and effort to develop.” A quote from Life Hacks, Love Lessons, a blog by Hemant Pandey, “an India film, theatre and television actor“.
Smooth Operator (1984) by Sade
artist, lyrics, video, Wiki-1, Wiki-2
He’s laughing with another girl
And playing with another heart
Placing high stakes, making hearts ache
He’s loved in seven languages
Diamond nights and ruby lights
High in the sky
Heaven help him when he falls
Note: all markings (bold, italic, underlining) by LO unless stated otherwise
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