Several days ago, I had a discussion with a friend about her son. She has difficulty in making choices as she claims that the situation and solution are “not easy”. After some talking with her, a clear picture emerged in my mind. That picture came as a surprise to me as initially I had taken her side. Slowly, it dawned upon me that my friend is the real problem and not her son.
My recent blog on faith, beliefs and willpower made me realise that her choices are hard because of these 3 dimensions. She does not have the willpower to execute a choice as she does not believe in that choice. She lacks in her belief as she does not have faith (ie, conviction) in the solution. She says my words are true but lacks faith and belief in them and thus also the willpower in making choices.
My words to her made me realise that my 3 concepts are interrelated. The original 7 Belief systems are part of a larger concept: Needs, Wants & Beliefs.
If Needs, Wants & Beliefs represents the time sequence (cradle to grave) then Faith, Beliefs & Willpower represents the spatial element.
In certain choices, Faith, Beliefs and Willpower do not necessarily have to be in line. Sometimes choices are solely based on Willpower, for instance when we must comply. Some people would argue that we have no choice in such a case. I think, feel and believe that we always have a choice whether or not to comply. Compliance is also a risk-reward decision based on (the absence of) future nuisance.
Usually our Beliefs are the engine behind our Willpower. In the absence of genuine beliefs, we will often say that we will “try“. Almost by definition, “trying” implies that you exercise your willpower without believing in it. Failure is the likely outcome when we “try” things. When trying results in success then we will start believing in it. Again, seeing is believing.
Sometimes our choices are solely based on Faith (eg, hope, trust). Example: we may lack believing in the future and our willpower may be weak as a result but still our faith keeps us running. Without Faith, Beliefs and Willpower all that remains is indecision and potentially despair. Despair is able to overturn everything and bring negative faith, beliefs and willpower (eg, suicide).
Although I don’t know what Faith is, it feels like a never-ending source of positive energy that feeds hope, love, trust. Faith is not new in my life. The only difference is that I acknowledge its presence. Before I was embarrassed talking about it. Now it feels that I have opened another dimension in which words and ideas “flow” to me. Perhaps Faith is its key. It would make sense.
Bon Jovi – Keep the Faith (1992) – artists, lyrics, video, Wiki-1, Wiki-2
Everybody needs somebody to love
(mother, mother)
Everybody needs somebody to hate
(please believe me)
Everybody’s bitching
’cause they can’t get enough
And it’s hard to hold on
When there’s no one to lean on
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